But, I just want to spend time to get to know you, for free. Why does that require money and screening? Besides, I thought “for time and companionship” was a euphemism for sex or smoke and mirrors? That’s what some of your colleagues said!
For them, it may very well be a mere euphemism for sex or smoke & mirrors, so I humbly invite you to entreaty them with your request, citing their previous statement on the matter as a basis for freebies. And of course that’s assuming they haven’t changed their mind on the issue. You two have fun with that, m’kay?
Most importantly, do not confuse companions/escorts/providers giving that advice to novices with regard to legal protection as something that applies to interaction with clients. When you request to spend time with me, I carve out a chunk of my day to spend time with you and you alone, and I am providing companionship by being fully present during that time. This is regardless of whatever activities we choose to partake in. Time is money. Energy is money. There is skill in Arts of Companionship learned via life lessons and study of complementary skills such as rhetorical conversation. AND I CHARGE FOR ALL OF IT.
Can I just say som–
Below are full color illustrations and pictures of activities that fall under “for time and companionship” and will be compensated per my requirements:
Meeting for coffee! Minimum rates applied. Not. At. Starbucks.
Dancing! Minimum rates applied. PLEASE BRING YOUR BEST RHYTHM.
Ice skating! Minimum rates applied. Band-aids, ACE bandages, may be required.
General chit-chat! Minimum rates applied. Wit appreciated.
Going places! Minimum rates & travel requirements applied. I’ll bring my own Xanax.
Watching the magic of artistic performance! Minimum rates applied. Snobbery decidedly unappreciated.
Fine, Claudia, I get it. You can st–
Dining! Minimum rates applied. You don’t make friends with salad.
Standing in front of the sun with our faces close together! Minimum rates applied. Bring your own sunblock.
Long-winded, multiple e-mails that may or may not result in an in-person appointment. SPECIAL RATES APPLIED! Hint: It’ll be twice my minimum.
Attending a laser show, possibly with music! Minimum rates applied. I hope we don’t lose our eyesight.
Working out! Minimum rates applied. Mama said knock you out. No really, she sent a note…
Taking me on a shopping spree at my favorite shops! Minimum rates applied + a $5000 shopping budget. You will also carry all the bags.
No, really, I GET IT NOW! But this still includes…you know….
Exhibit M? HELL YES IT DOES!
Watching HOT TURTLE SEX at the zoo! Minimum rates applied. I know, I love watching it too….
*sigh* Was all this necessary?